Roots, Bloody Roots

I should've dyed my hair in June.

So it's been awhile, yes. My roots are coming in with a vengeance. VENGEANCE!

I realize that. I know that half my hair is blonde, and the other half is DARK blonde. Oh, the shame. I hang my head, surely.

But here's the thing... there are factors that have been preventing me from fixing this unbecoming problem.

1. I'm indecisive and wasn't sure whether to stick to the usual highlights, or finally take the plunge and go dark. At this point, I'm 85% sure of the darkness a-comin'.

2. My regular hairdresser is in St. Catharines, and I haven't been back home in many many months. I rarely trust someone new, and don't know where to go.

3. MONEY. In order to have it done properly, it's gonna cost me a pretty penny. And at this point, the only pennies I have are ugly. I have to pay bills and such before succumbing to vanity. Responsiblities, ya heard of em?

So try and remember that when you come up to me daily and tell me how badly I need to "do something about my hair".

Cuz, gosh golly gee! I hadn't noticed.

Moral of the story?

SHAAAAADDAP!

Unless you're going to give me money and steer me in the direction of the best hairdresser in Toronto, you'd be wise to keep it to yourself.

You will only have to deal with my appalling appearance for a short while longer, and then you can finally sleep at night knowing that my hair is all one colour.

Stay strong til then. Use the force, Luke.

Asshat.

Content Is A Real Word. No, Seriously.

On Saturday night, me and the boy were hanging out with friends at their house.

At one point, I went and sat on the front porch alone for a few minutes, having a smoke. Sitting there, watching people walk by, hearing the muffled voices of my friends inside - I felt oddly content.

Content to sit there, content knowing I was going back inside to be with great people. Content in general.

It's such a rare and wild feeling for me, it was almost exhilarating. With so many day-to-day stresses and worries, I realized that I never quite reach that feeling of "Hey... this is good. Let's go with this."

I made a mental note to go inside and grab the pad of paper and pen that I always carry in my purse, and jot down key words that would remind me of that moment. I wanted to remember, to write it on here, and possibly recycle it for myself.

I never did write it down.

It came up later that night in a conversation with my friend Laura, and I knew I'd remember it today. Now I know it can happen, and things can be fine. I have love, I have friends, I have opportunities... Not bad for a pessimistic insecure bitch.

Does this mean I'll change, and everything will be sunshine, lollipops and rainbows?

Hell no.

But it'll be better. I had a glimpse.